It seemed like such a great conversation, and I was listening to me
so attentively, or so I thought I was.
But although I was in a great mood and I thought the story was charming,
(the other) I was bored and I wanted to make me stop. I decided the
best way to get me to shut up was to do something so horrible, so vile
and offensive to me that I would be shocked into silence.
So I reached up over my head to myself and grabbed my chest.
I was so shocked, so violated and scandalized, so aghast at myself that
just like I expected, I was completely speechless.
And while I was shocked and angry and wanted to get revenge on me, I thought it was funny and laughed at me.
I was hurt that I was laughing at me, so I was even more angry at me,
and I thought that made it even funnier so I laughed at me more.
Finally I couldn't take me anymore, so I prepared to bite me.
I wasn't expecting me to bite me, so I had no idea what I was doing
until it was too late...
Ouch! I bit me! What a b****! I can't believe I just
bit me! OW OW OW OW!
I'm so glad I bit me, because now I'll never try to grab me again. If I do, I'll bite me again. Nobody touches me without my permission, not even me.
I was so mad that I bit me, and even more mad at me because I was still
biting me and wouldn't let go, that I reached up to slap me.
I saw the slap coming, but I wasn't fast enough to get out of my way and smack, I got slapped (by me!).
Nasty. I had no idea I was such a perverted and violent person.
I thought I was nice, and now I have no respect for me. Who ever
would have thought that sweet, innocent me would be one to feel me up,
bite, and slap me? Not me. I can hardly believe it. So
My face hurt from being slapped by me. My finger hurt from being
bitten. I sat trying to comprehend the pain in my face while I sat and
sulked about my injured finger, and thought about how I disliked the other
Finally, as the pain and surprise faded, I realized how angry I was
so I sat there glowering at me while I was sulking at me.
Wow, I was being a baby! But so was I, we both were.
Everyone knows that I can hold a grudge, and very stubbornly too.
I can't help it, I'm a scorpio. (If you go for that crap)
But seriously, if I hadn't done something, I'd probably not ever have talked to me again.
But I'm smarter than that.
I hold a grudge maybe, but I'm not so stupid to throw away a good friendship over a silly little spat.
So I apologized to me for being mean and stupid, and I said I was sorry for everything, and I am friends with me again.
I listen to my stupid stories, and respect my personal space, and most
importantly, I don't bite myself, and now I get along with me very well.
I think we can all learn a lesson from this.